oops--forgot to post addresses to locations for Patricia's prayer service, funeral, and wake.
Prayer service at Heritage Funeral Home, 57th and south Minnesota Avenue,
7 PM Friday, June 17th.
Funeral: St. Joseph's Cathedral School, 523 N. Duluth Avenue.
Services are in the school gym, as the church renovation is not yet completed. There is a ramp at the west end of the school by which you could enter. There are probably other doors that I am not aware of right now.
Interment: St. Michael's Cemetery, 3001 N. Cliff Avenue. You should be able to follow other cars. If you are making your own way there, go north on MN avenue to Russel St, turn right (east) and follow this road out to St. Michael's.
We will be going to the cemetery immediately after the funeral, then return to the school cafeteria for dinner.Father Fitzgerald has a tight schedule on Saturday, otherwise we would have had dinner first.
Annie
Wake: Mary and Randy's house, 1104 W. 5th St.
Friday, June 17, 2011
Monday, June 13, 2011
She Made It
As some of you may have heard, our dear mother, Patricia Ann Fallon passed away this morning around 10 AM. Mary, Kevin, Steve and Kathy and I were here; Paul and Tom arrived within a couple of minutes, and Jane a short while after. Colleen had been here over Memorial Day weekend, and will be back to Sioux Falls soon with her family.
One of our hospice nurses, Mary, called us as we were sitting with Mom about 9 AM this morning, and I told her what we had for vitals. She came right over, and in the 10 minutes or so it took her to get here, Mom had begun to slow down more. By about 10 AM, mom took the advice we had been giving her for a couple of days, and left for Heaven. It was a moment we expected, tried to plan for (how silly!) and had difficulty integrating when it happened.We had so many layered emotions; it was a very powerful and humbling experience, and we were honored to be there with her.
We are planning so far to have a prayer service at 7 PM this Friday (Heritage Funeral Home), with a gathering at Mary and Randy's (1104 W. 5th St.) afterward, and then the funeral at 10 AM Saturday at Cathedral. The ceremony will be in the gym of the school, because the church is still under renovation. We will have a dinner in the school cafeteria afterward. Mom will be buried at St. Michael's Cemetery next to Donald. That is just 10 minutes or so away from Cathedral. I will post a map in the morning, with all the relevant destinations. Just so you know, we have to get the final confirmation from Fr. Fitzpatrick tomorrow, but the church secretary said that these times should work with his schedule. Another item: we have not decided yet the order of events following the funeral--dinner then cemetery? Or cemetery then dinner? :) We may arrange things so that dinner will begin to be served, while those who wish to leave for the cemetery do so. We are sure there will be people who will not be going out to St. Michael's, and they could have dinner and visit while we do that.
Thanks for your kind calls and visits. You have lifted all of us up, especially Patricia.
Love,
Annie
Kevin here, just wanted to add that when the Hospice chaplain came for a prayer service after she passed, we had a chance to sing a couple of Mom's favorite songs for her giving a final send off, we sang Amazing Grace and When Irish Eyes Are Smiling and we think Mom was singing along.
The Friday night prayer service will be at Heritage Funeral Home at 4800 S. Minnesota Ave., in Sioux Falls. It is on the southeast corner of Minnesota Ave and 57th Street.
The funeral service is in the school gym right next to St. Joseph's Cathedral at 5th St. and N. Duluth. You can also park in the school parking lot behind the gym. That entrance is off of 4th St and Summit Ave.
We thank one and all for the kind thoughts, prayers and condolences that have been extended to our family. Thank you to each and all!
One of our hospice nurses, Mary, called us as we were sitting with Mom about 9 AM this morning, and I told her what we had for vitals. She came right over, and in the 10 minutes or so it took her to get here, Mom had begun to slow down more. By about 10 AM, mom took the advice we had been giving her for a couple of days, and left for Heaven. It was a moment we expected, tried to plan for (how silly!) and had difficulty integrating when it happened.We had so many layered emotions; it was a very powerful and humbling experience, and we were honored to be there with her.
We are planning so far to have a prayer service at 7 PM this Friday (Heritage Funeral Home), with a gathering at Mary and Randy's (1104 W. 5th St.) afterward, and then the funeral at 10 AM Saturday at Cathedral. The ceremony will be in the gym of the school, because the church is still under renovation. We will have a dinner in the school cafeteria afterward. Mom will be buried at St. Michael's Cemetery next to Donald. That is just 10 minutes or so away from Cathedral. I will post a map in the morning, with all the relevant destinations. Just so you know, we have to get the final confirmation from Fr. Fitzpatrick tomorrow, but the church secretary said that these times should work with his schedule. Another item: we have not decided yet the order of events following the funeral--dinner then cemetery? Or cemetery then dinner? :) We may arrange things so that dinner will begin to be served, while those who wish to leave for the cemetery do so. We are sure there will be people who will not be going out to St. Michael's, and they could have dinner and visit while we do that.
Thanks for your kind calls and visits. You have lifted all of us up, especially Patricia.
Love,
Annie
Kevin here, just wanted to add that when the Hospice chaplain came for a prayer service after she passed, we had a chance to sing a couple of Mom's favorite songs for her giving a final send off, we sang Amazing Grace and When Irish Eyes Are Smiling and we think Mom was singing along.
The Friday night prayer service will be at Heritage Funeral Home at 4800 S. Minnesota Ave., in Sioux Falls. It is on the southeast corner of Minnesota Ave and 57th Street.
The funeral service is in the school gym right next to St. Joseph's Cathedral at 5th St. and N. Duluth. You can also park in the school parking lot behind the gym. That entrance is off of 4th St and Summit Ave.
We thank one and all for the kind thoughts, prayers and condolences that have been extended to our family. Thank you to each and all!
Friday, June 10, 2011
Friday Night Notes
Hello from Sioux Falls,
Tonight finds us continuing to monitor Gram. She has been sleeping all day, except when we gave her care. Even then, she sometimes did not rouse. She is only minimally able to swallow, so no food (Ensure) today and just a few cc of water. She has had some trouble with leg cramps,which made her restless.. Our nurse helped us work out a plan with med. and warm towels from the dryer. The muscle finally relaxed, and so did Gram.
What we are working for right now is to keep her comfortable. So glad we have the hosp. bed. She seems more comfy with her head elevated.
It is so interesting that as Gram prepares to head back to heaven, we are also awaiting the birth of Maya Rose Wilmeth in Omaha. She was due on this past Wednesday, but seems to be holding out for a bit. She is Mary and Randy's second grandchild, and will be born to their daughter Rachael and her husband Mike.
This reminds me that Liz was born around the time that Grampa Don passed. Comings and goings....
In more arrival news, Kevin flew in from Denver yesterday, and we are so glad that he could come. Mom gave him several smiles when he got here, reached out to touch his arm. Kevin, Mary and I are sitting in Gram's room now, keeping her company and visiting with each other. Today Kevin made the most incredibly awesome chicken chili....fresh cilantro, celery, cheddar cheese, and a whole bunch of other great stuff. Best I ever tasted, extreme comfort food.
I am going to hang at home tomorrow instead of going to the art fair. Tom will take my display (and sell it all, I am sure!). He has some beautiful handcarved walking sticks, and pendants made of slices of interesting driftwood branches. He finds a lot of neat materials when hiking around the river. Our friend Lindsay will also be there, so that if we need Tom, he can zip over here in a short time.
Wow, the fireworks are going strong right now. The Sioux Falls Pheasants (used to be the Canaries) had a game tonight, and they always have some pyrotechnics afterward. Their stadium (aka The Birdcage) is not too far away. We can watch them and certainly hear them very well. Kind of fun. It is also nice to be a block away from Terrace Park when the Sunday night concert is going on.
It is a fun neighborhood in so many ways.
Mary and I met some of our new neighbors across the street. Becky is an energetic young mom with 4 little boys and another baby on the way. She is also an artist, and the three of us promised each other to get together for some artsy time one day.
Gram is still resting peacefully, all snuggled into her pillows and soft blankets. Will write again soon.
Love,
Annie, Kevin, Mary and all the Fallon kids.
Tonight finds us continuing to monitor Gram. She has been sleeping all day, except when we gave her care. Even then, she sometimes did not rouse. She is only minimally able to swallow, so no food (Ensure) today and just a few cc of water. She has had some trouble with leg cramps,which made her restless.. Our nurse helped us work out a plan with med. and warm towels from the dryer. The muscle finally relaxed, and so did Gram.
What we are working for right now is to keep her comfortable. So glad we have the hosp. bed. She seems more comfy with her head elevated.
It is so interesting that as Gram prepares to head back to heaven, we are also awaiting the birth of Maya Rose Wilmeth in Omaha. She was due on this past Wednesday, but seems to be holding out for a bit. She is Mary and Randy's second grandchild, and will be born to their daughter Rachael and her husband Mike.
This reminds me that Liz was born around the time that Grampa Don passed. Comings and goings....
In more arrival news, Kevin flew in from Denver yesterday, and we are so glad that he could come. Mom gave him several smiles when he got here, reached out to touch his arm. Kevin, Mary and I are sitting in Gram's room now, keeping her company and visiting with each other. Today Kevin made the most incredibly awesome chicken chili....fresh cilantro, celery, cheddar cheese, and a whole bunch of other great stuff. Best I ever tasted, extreme comfort food.
I am going to hang at home tomorrow instead of going to the art fair. Tom will take my display (and sell it all, I am sure!). He has some beautiful handcarved walking sticks, and pendants made of slices of interesting driftwood branches. He finds a lot of neat materials when hiking around the river. Our friend Lindsay will also be there, so that if we need Tom, he can zip over here in a short time.
Wow, the fireworks are going strong right now. The Sioux Falls Pheasants (used to be the Canaries) had a game tonight, and they always have some pyrotechnics afterward. Their stadium (aka The Birdcage) is not too far away. We can watch them and certainly hear them very well. Kind of fun. It is also nice to be a block away from Terrace Park when the Sunday night concert is going on.
It is a fun neighborhood in so many ways.
Mary and I met some of our new neighbors across the street. Becky is an energetic young mom with 4 little boys and another baby on the way. She is also an artist, and the three of us promised each other to get together for some artsy time one day.
Gram is still resting peacefully, all snuggled into her pillows and soft blankets. Will write again soon.
Love,
Annie, Kevin, Mary and all the Fallon kids.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Thursday. June 9
Hello everyone,
Sorry I have not been a good correspondent lately. Have been busy, (but mostly in my head) and just have not sat down to pull together thoughts about how we are doing. Alz. is such a rollercoaster. Three steps into decline, then two steps to the positive. You keep trying to anticipate needs, adjust the emotions and effort levels to meet those, but each day or week keeps bringing more surprises. It was also sad to have lost our cousin Kimmie.. What a vibrant lady she ahd been! Tom, Paul and Steve attended her funeral. Mary and I thought we should hang here, as things were a bit touch-and-go with Mom around that time.
Today, Mom seems to be fairly static in her declined functioning. She is very unresponsive, though she will open her eyes if we insist (just to see if she can). She is again not able to swallow, as she was over Memorial Day weekend. She has lost a great deal of weight due to being too tired to eat, or too disinterested. Our dear Mom may be on her way home for real this time, and we will be so happy for her when she does not have to endure more. We shall keep you posted. When she does pass away and we end up finalizing funeral arrangements, we are going to try for a Saturday, if possible. This could facilitate travel for a lot of people or make it easier for those who are working M-F to attend.
Steve and Kathy were here over the past weekend, and it was great having them around. Steve and Tom did some maintenance involving tall ladders (thank you so much!-I was not excited about climbing up there myself!!!). Kathy kept the laundry and dishwasher humming, in addition to being our supportive geriatric nurse consultant.
Last week, Susan and Mary Parsley came to visit. I know it was emotionally, and physically difficult for Mary, as she is still recovering from her hip surgery. Mom was awake, but sort of in her own world during the time they were here. We were hoping for a lucid window, and though that did not appear. She was able to smile several times, and I feel that Mom was aware, on some level, of the love between them.
The last two weeks we have been going through boxes and boxes of old photos. Surprisingly, we came across some that none of us remember ever seeing, such as portraits of our Fallon grandparents and great-grandparents, snaps of Mom and Dad during dating years, interesting events such as a skating party on the pond at the Sutton farm, with JJ (I think) in his Army uniform. There are several of young women all dressed up in the latest fashions (which they probably sewed themselves), standing in a row on the bottom step of the front porch of Gramma and Grampa Sutton's house.
There is a lovely 5 x 7 of an outdoor breakfast served by Nel Hartwig after a morning horse ride. Mom is wearing a pretty striped dress, and helping to set food out on a table. Looks as if it was a beautiful day. Nel is the professor from SDSU that introduced Mom and Dad. I wonder if Mom went riding....hmmm. Nel is outfitted in jodpurs and knee boots, ever the horsewoman. From the stories I have heard, she had enough personality for 5 people.
Sarah Arnold is making a photo slideshow for us so that we can share some of these little gems.
OK, my loved ones, time to get going and pull some things together. Tommy and I are going to try to represent at an art fair at Harrisburg on Saturday. We will have to see how things go on the homefront first, but we will still try to be ready in case it works out that we can go.
Take care of yourselves, and we will keep you posted.
Love,
Annie and all the Fallon kids
Sorry I have not been a good correspondent lately. Have been busy, (but mostly in my head) and just have not sat down to pull together thoughts about how we are doing. Alz. is such a rollercoaster. Three steps into decline, then two steps to the positive. You keep trying to anticipate needs, adjust the emotions and effort levels to meet those, but each day or week keeps bringing more surprises. It was also sad to have lost our cousin Kimmie.. What a vibrant lady she ahd been! Tom, Paul and Steve attended her funeral. Mary and I thought we should hang here, as things were a bit touch-and-go with Mom around that time.
Today, Mom seems to be fairly static in her declined functioning. She is very unresponsive, though she will open her eyes if we insist (just to see if she can). She is again not able to swallow, as she was over Memorial Day weekend. She has lost a great deal of weight due to being too tired to eat, or too disinterested. Our dear Mom may be on her way home for real this time, and we will be so happy for her when she does not have to endure more. We shall keep you posted. When she does pass away and we end up finalizing funeral arrangements, we are going to try for a Saturday, if possible. This could facilitate travel for a lot of people or make it easier for those who are working M-F to attend.
Steve and Kathy were here over the past weekend, and it was great having them around. Steve and Tom did some maintenance involving tall ladders (thank you so much!-I was not excited about climbing up there myself!!!). Kathy kept the laundry and dishwasher humming, in addition to being our supportive geriatric nurse consultant.
Last week, Susan and Mary Parsley came to visit. I know it was emotionally, and physically difficult for Mary, as she is still recovering from her hip surgery. Mom was awake, but sort of in her own world during the time they were here. We were hoping for a lucid window, and though that did not appear. She was able to smile several times, and I feel that Mom was aware, on some level, of the love between them.
The last two weeks we have been going through boxes and boxes of old photos. Surprisingly, we came across some that none of us remember ever seeing, such as portraits of our Fallon grandparents and great-grandparents, snaps of Mom and Dad during dating years, interesting events such as a skating party on the pond at the Sutton farm, with JJ (I think) in his Army uniform. There are several of young women all dressed up in the latest fashions (which they probably sewed themselves), standing in a row on the bottom step of the front porch of Gramma and Grampa Sutton's house.
There is a lovely 5 x 7 of an outdoor breakfast served by Nel Hartwig after a morning horse ride. Mom is wearing a pretty striped dress, and helping to set food out on a table. Looks as if it was a beautiful day. Nel is the professor from SDSU that introduced Mom and Dad. I wonder if Mom went riding....hmmm. Nel is outfitted in jodpurs and knee boots, ever the horsewoman. From the stories I have heard, she had enough personality for 5 people.
Sarah Arnold is making a photo slideshow for us so that we can share some of these little gems.
OK, my loved ones, time to get going and pull some things together. Tommy and I are going to try to represent at an art fair at Harrisburg on Saturday. We will have to see how things go on the homefront first, but we will still try to be ready in case it works out that we can go.
Take care of yourselves, and we will keep you posted.
Love,
Annie and all the Fallon kids
Monday, April 25, 2011
Easter Monday News
Hello Again,
It was a lovely Easter day here. We also had a lovely dinner with Mary & Randy, Melissa and her boyfriend Mike (we really like him!), and Paul. Mom was beautiful in a new, deep turquoise silky tank top with matching sort-of-sheer jacket. It had a circle ruffle at the elbow. She wore her pearls too. I am kicking myself because I did not take a picture. She looked so pretty. I will try to have her wear that again soon, and take a pic then.
I have told this story to some of you, and some of you were first-hand witnesses. But here it goes again. Mary had made a gorgeous layered strawberry shortcake trifle dessert in a footed glass bowl. It was as tasty as you could imagine. So, Gram and I were sharing a serving of this. When it was gone, I decided I would like a bit more, so I said, "Gram says she would like more", as I passed my bowl back to Mary. There was somewhat of a clamor around the table as my statement was vociferously refuted by people who are supposed to love me. I then lied further, saying that Gram may have whispered this to me, or communicated by pointing to the dessert, and that is why no one but me heard her.
Suddenly, she clearly piped up, "Gram DOES NOT want more dessert!"
She has not spoken a complete sentence for a long time, nor has her speech been very intelligible. It was so much fun to know that she was listening then, and not about to let me get away with bending the truth.
On another note, I must say again that Gram continues to lose interest in eating. Today, for example, she could only eat half of her oatmeal, when a week and a half ago, she would eat the whole serving. Last night, she also began to show signs of having forgotten how to use a straw, after having been able to use one at Easter dinner. We struggled for a bit, then just went to a transparent glass. That way, I could see what she was getting related to the angle at which I held the glass. I have made her choke a few times, and the straws really helped us avoid that. Maybe this skill will come back to her; we will just have to see.
Several hours later, after I wrote this whole post>>>.....wow....how quickly things can change. Mom was able to get up from bed, use the commode, get in wheelchair, and get to the table. She ate some of Randy's luscious home-made chicken noodle soup (yes, even the noodles are home-made), drank a whole Ensure, 8 oz water, 8 oz milk,
and had an ice cream cup for dessert. She used the straw very well! Just wanted to let you know.
We need to be aware of the fact that if Mom's ability to take in nutrition and fluids continues to reduce, she could be leaving us this spring. I have heard some people say that without nutrition, a person could live for two weeks. Without water, maybe several days. We can give ice chips and swab Mom's mouth, though, if she can no longer drink, but another issue is swallowing. Niki says that some people forget to swallow, and then, giving fluids will cause choking. So far Mom can swallow, if we can get the fluids past her clenched teeth. Maybe she has decided that she is ready to be finished with all this, and she is taking advantage of something that she has control of.
I will try to get a weight on Gram tomorrow, if her feet do not hurt too much to stand on the scale.
Over the weekend, when we would get her to her feet to transfer, Mom would cry out that her feet hurt. She had difficulty taking small steps to turn herself around and sit in the wheelchair. It was obviously quite painful. We looked at her feet last night, and could not see anything. Today, however, both feet are swollen, and there are some red hot spots here and there. We would put a cold pack on them, but cold is very aversive for Mom. She probably would not be able to tolerate that. So we are making sure that her feet are elevated quite a bit of the time. Niki is coming in the morning to check this out.
Another interesting thing: we have talked about the fact that Gram has been seeing various people: the little boy with red hair, John, Edward, J.J., and 'the beautiful woman'. This week, for three days in a row, she asked me, 'Who is that tall gentleman?". Since I was only aware of the two of us there. I asked what he looked like, what color hair he had. She was able to say one time that he had dark hair, but that was it for describing this mystery man. I like to think it may have been Dad, checking in on her. Others may think that her brain is hallucinating. Just putting it out there for your consideration.
This experience of being with Mom is really quite rich in learning patience, learning how to accept new limitations, confusions, fatigue, and silly stuff like frustration with equipment.
There have been hilarious times, cozy times, times that make your heart swell.( ie: when Mom so often says, "Thank you so much" for the smallest thing. She also takes our hands and looks into our eyes, with some confusion in hers. We give her our name, and the confusion leaves her face, and she smiles and squeezes our hands.
Hospice continues to be so good to us. On Saturday, Mary, one of their nurses, volunteered to come sit with Mom so I could go out to lunch with Lindsay and her mom. We went to a newer place, called 'Kebobs'; the food was wonderful, and reasonably priced. After that, we went down to 'boutique row', the converted railroad station on 8th street. We wandered in and out of all the shops. In one of them, they were having a drawing to celebrate the fact that they now carry Vera Bradley bags. We all put our names in, and they called me today. I won the grand prize, an $88 tote that could be a carry-on! I have never had a bag that cost more than $20, I think. Mostly because I love searching for designer bags at Goodwill, where they are about $3. (...the thrill of the hunt.....) But this was fun, too! Mary got off early today, came to sit with Mom so I could go pick it up. It is very pretty, with about a dozen handy pockets. I may take it on the plane to Indiana when I go to Alex's graduation.
OK, should get this posted and get going.
Love to all!
Keep up the good work, Aunt Mary!
Annie and Gramma Trish the Dish
It was a lovely Easter day here. We also had a lovely dinner with Mary & Randy, Melissa and her boyfriend Mike (we really like him!), and Paul. Mom was beautiful in a new, deep turquoise silky tank top with matching sort-of-sheer jacket. It had a circle ruffle at the elbow. She wore her pearls too. I am kicking myself because I did not take a picture. She looked so pretty. I will try to have her wear that again soon, and take a pic then.
I have told this story to some of you, and some of you were first-hand witnesses. But here it goes again. Mary had made a gorgeous layered strawberry shortcake trifle dessert in a footed glass bowl. It was as tasty as you could imagine. So, Gram and I were sharing a serving of this. When it was gone, I decided I would like a bit more, so I said, "Gram says she would like more", as I passed my bowl back to Mary. There was somewhat of a clamor around the table as my statement was vociferously refuted by people who are supposed to love me. I then lied further, saying that Gram may have whispered this to me, or communicated by pointing to the dessert, and that is why no one but me heard her.
Suddenly, she clearly piped up, "Gram DOES NOT want more dessert!"
She has not spoken a complete sentence for a long time, nor has her speech been very intelligible. It was so much fun to know that she was listening then, and not about to let me get away with bending the truth.
On another note, I must say again that Gram continues to lose interest in eating. Today, for example, she could only eat half of her oatmeal, when a week and a half ago, she would eat the whole serving. Last night, she also began to show signs of having forgotten how to use a straw, after having been able to use one at Easter dinner. We struggled for a bit, then just went to a transparent glass. That way, I could see what she was getting related to the angle at which I held the glass. I have made her choke a few times, and the straws really helped us avoid that. Maybe this skill will come back to her; we will just have to see.
Several hours later, after I wrote this whole post>>>.....wow....how quickly things can change. Mom was able to get up from bed, use the commode, get in wheelchair, and get to the table. She ate some of Randy's luscious home-made chicken noodle soup (yes, even the noodles are home-made), drank a whole Ensure, 8 oz water, 8 oz milk,
and had an ice cream cup for dessert. She used the straw very well! Just wanted to let you know.
We need to be aware of the fact that if Mom's ability to take in nutrition and fluids continues to reduce, she could be leaving us this spring. I have heard some people say that without nutrition, a person could live for two weeks. Without water, maybe several days. We can give ice chips and swab Mom's mouth, though, if she can no longer drink, but another issue is swallowing. Niki says that some people forget to swallow, and then, giving fluids will cause choking. So far Mom can swallow, if we can get the fluids past her clenched teeth. Maybe she has decided that she is ready to be finished with all this, and she is taking advantage of something that she has control of.
I will try to get a weight on Gram tomorrow, if her feet do not hurt too much to stand on the scale.
Over the weekend, when we would get her to her feet to transfer, Mom would cry out that her feet hurt. She had difficulty taking small steps to turn herself around and sit in the wheelchair. It was obviously quite painful. We looked at her feet last night, and could not see anything. Today, however, both feet are swollen, and there are some red hot spots here and there. We would put a cold pack on them, but cold is very aversive for Mom. She probably would not be able to tolerate that. So we are making sure that her feet are elevated quite a bit of the time. Niki is coming in the morning to check this out.
Another interesting thing: we have talked about the fact that Gram has been seeing various people: the little boy with red hair, John, Edward, J.J., and 'the beautiful woman'. This week, for three days in a row, she asked me, 'Who is that tall gentleman?". Since I was only aware of the two of us there. I asked what he looked like, what color hair he had. She was able to say one time that he had dark hair, but that was it for describing this mystery man. I like to think it may have been Dad, checking in on her. Others may think that her brain is hallucinating. Just putting it out there for your consideration.
This experience of being with Mom is really quite rich in learning patience, learning how to accept new limitations, confusions, fatigue, and silly stuff like frustration with equipment.
There have been hilarious times, cozy times, times that make your heart swell.( ie: when Mom so often says, "Thank you so much" for the smallest thing. She also takes our hands and looks into our eyes, with some confusion in hers. We give her our name, and the confusion leaves her face, and she smiles and squeezes our hands.
Hospice continues to be so good to us. On Saturday, Mary, one of their nurses, volunteered to come sit with Mom so I could go out to lunch with Lindsay and her mom. We went to a newer place, called 'Kebobs'; the food was wonderful, and reasonably priced. After that, we went down to 'boutique row', the converted railroad station on 8th street. We wandered in and out of all the shops. In one of them, they were having a drawing to celebrate the fact that they now carry Vera Bradley bags. We all put our names in, and they called me today. I won the grand prize, an $88 tote that could be a carry-on! I have never had a bag that cost more than $20, I think. Mostly because I love searching for designer bags at Goodwill, where they are about $3. (...the thrill of the hunt.....) But this was fun, too! Mary got off early today, came to sit with Mom so I could go pick it up. It is very pretty, with about a dozen handy pockets. I may take it on the plane to Indiana when I go to Alex's graduation.
OK, should get this posted and get going.
Love to all!
Keep up the good work, Aunt Mary!
Annie and Gramma Trish the Dish
Friday, April 22, 2011
Gram Notes
Hi everyone,
Gram continues to be her happy, positive self. We brought in a hospital bed for her a few weeks ago, because she seemed to like sleeping in one when in respite care. She does the same thing here-when settling in for the night, or a nap, she smiles and smiles! When asked if her bed is comfy, she says, "OH, yes!" so there's an endorsement.
We may have zeroed in on a better sleep med, Risperidone. Gram can have one to four tabs each evening. Usually it is 2, so that is good that she is not needing the max dose all the time so far, and we have some options left there. This is about the 5th sleep med we have tried. Some have made her more agitated instead of calmer. We were told to watch for that, as it can happen often in older people. We have had some wild and very interesting nights, but they are much more predictable now.
Mom has had some recovery of the use of her feet/legs and her ability to stand and pivot to a new seat. For a couple of weeks now, she went back to how she was before Mary's birthday. That was the day when her legs suddenly did not support her at all. We have not been walking, but just being able to transfer means she can get the heck out of bed, use the bathroom, get a GOOD shower in the tub (with a shampoo!), get to the table, use her rocker that she loves, and so on. It is amazing how important this one ability can be.
The last 2 days, Mom has been very tired, however. She was not able to respond well to prompts of 'wake up", "let's go, Kokomo!" and all our other silly morning rituals. She just curled up more compactly in her blankets, and ignored me. Sometimes she would say, "No, no, NO!" and grab blankets back from me. I like that spirit.
When this happens, I work on getting some breakfast into her by serving it in bed. We got a hosp. table with the bed, so I put that over her, bring in the coffee, toast, yogurt, oatmeat---whatever we are having that day. Most days this inspires her to participate, but it did not work the last 2 days. She could have cared less about her morning cup of coffee, which she generally loves. I tried Ensure with a straw in the bottle, and that is the only thing that got a positive response. She was able to swallow that. I think the delivery method, using a straw and keeping the mouth sealed, helps her to swallow. She did not do well with yogurt, applesauce or other foods presented on a spoon. If she allowed this food into her mouth at all (sometimes she did not), it sort of just sat there. Choking risk became an issue, so I quit trying to spoon-feed her if she did not swallow initially
On Wednesday, I kept at it until we finally got up and dressed. However, Mom had difficulty staying awake in her chair. He head was down most of the time, and it took a lot of prompting to get her to eat. She wold sleep unless I made a lot of 1-to-1 interaction attempts It got to be so that I was pretty much standing on my head to get her to interact and eat. After a while, I asked if she wanted to lie down, and she said 'yes'. So that is what we did. Mom had an afternoon nap, and we got up again for the evening. She did eat a small dinner, and then went to bed for the night.
Strangely, she was pretty restless, so we worked our way up to 4 Risperidone tabs, her limit.
Then next day, Thurs., as I have mentioned, she was very sedate. This morning, although she is not up out of bed yet, she has showed signs of being more chipper and 'with it'. Yay!
I need tot wrap this up and get us going, but not before I wonder aloud again about the strangeness of ALZ. At school, we dealt with a lot of brain issues, traumatic brain injury, strokes, congenital brian abnormalities, cortical blindness. In my experience, brain functioning was fairly static, staying the same over time. We tried to access other parts of the brain for basic skills, by programming and repetition. With ALZ, functioning can seem lost, then magicallly reappear the next day. Our nurse, Niki, explains to me: "It's not a linear disease". That is my new mantra for the week.
.
Our trusted expert in geriatric/dementia care, our sister Kathy Fallon, says that there may come a time when Mom is just tired of eating, or just not interested any more. She also may forget to swallow, in which case, continuing to try to feed her will eventually induce choking.
I figure that she can choose to sleep or not, eat or not,, and so on. If you have other feelings on this, let's talk about it.
Alrighty then, talk to you later!
Love from the Home Office,
Annie and Gram
Gram continues to be her happy, positive self. We brought in a hospital bed for her a few weeks ago, because she seemed to like sleeping in one when in respite care. She does the same thing here-when settling in for the night, or a nap, she smiles and smiles! When asked if her bed is comfy, she says, "OH, yes!" so there's an endorsement.
We may have zeroed in on a better sleep med, Risperidone. Gram can have one to four tabs each evening. Usually it is 2, so that is good that she is not needing the max dose all the time so far, and we have some options left there. This is about the 5th sleep med we have tried. Some have made her more agitated instead of calmer. We were told to watch for that, as it can happen often in older people. We have had some wild and very interesting nights, but they are much more predictable now.
Mom has had some recovery of the use of her feet/legs and her ability to stand and pivot to a new seat. For a couple of weeks now, she went back to how she was before Mary's birthday. That was the day when her legs suddenly did not support her at all. We have not been walking, but just being able to transfer means she can get the heck out of bed, use the bathroom, get a GOOD shower in the tub (with a shampoo!), get to the table, use her rocker that she loves, and so on. It is amazing how important this one ability can be.
The last 2 days, Mom has been very tired, however. She was not able to respond well to prompts of 'wake up", "let's go, Kokomo!" and all our other silly morning rituals. She just curled up more compactly in her blankets, and ignored me. Sometimes she would say, "No, no, NO!" and grab blankets back from me. I like that spirit.
When this happens, I work on getting some breakfast into her by serving it in bed. We got a hosp. table with the bed, so I put that over her, bring in the coffee, toast, yogurt, oatmeat---whatever we are having that day. Most days this inspires her to participate, but it did not work the last 2 days. She could have cared less about her morning cup of coffee, which she generally loves. I tried Ensure with a straw in the bottle, and that is the only thing that got a positive response. She was able to swallow that. I think the delivery method, using a straw and keeping the mouth sealed, helps her to swallow. She did not do well with yogurt, applesauce or other foods presented on a spoon. If she allowed this food into her mouth at all (sometimes she did not), it sort of just sat there. Choking risk became an issue, so I quit trying to spoon-feed her if she did not swallow initially
On Wednesday, I kept at it until we finally got up and dressed. However, Mom had difficulty staying awake in her chair. He head was down most of the time, and it took a lot of prompting to get her to eat. She wold sleep unless I made a lot of 1-to-1 interaction attempts It got to be so that I was pretty much standing on my head to get her to interact and eat. After a while, I asked if she wanted to lie down, and she said 'yes'. So that is what we did. Mom had an afternoon nap, and we got up again for the evening. She did eat a small dinner, and then went to bed for the night.
Strangely, she was pretty restless, so we worked our way up to 4 Risperidone tabs, her limit.
Then next day, Thurs., as I have mentioned, she was very sedate. This morning, although she is not up out of bed yet, she has showed signs of being more chipper and 'with it'. Yay!
I need tot wrap this up and get us going, but not before I wonder aloud again about the strangeness of ALZ. At school, we dealt with a lot of brain issues, traumatic brain injury, strokes, congenital brian abnormalities, cortical blindness. In my experience, brain functioning was fairly static, staying the same over time. We tried to access other parts of the brain for basic skills, by programming and repetition. With ALZ, functioning can seem lost, then magicallly reappear the next day. Our nurse, Niki, explains to me: "It's not a linear disease". That is my new mantra for the week.
.
Our trusted expert in geriatric/dementia care, our sister Kathy Fallon, says that there may come a time when Mom is just tired of eating, or just not interested any more. She also may forget to swallow, in which case, continuing to try to feed her will eventually induce choking.
I figure that she can choose to sleep or not, eat or not,, and so on. If you have other feelings on this, let's talk about it.
Alrighty then, talk to you later!
Love from the Home Office,
Annie and Gram
Notes on Marfan's Syndrome in the Fallon Family
Tim and I am awaiting our follow up appts with the cardiologist after my tilt table test, and Tim's cardiac ablation. Double checking Tim's rhythm, and EKG, and we still need to find a treatment for me to take...meds to make me keep water in my body so I don't dehydrate which causes low blood volume, and low BP, passing out. Or steroids to help with this as well.
I have found out that my low BP can also be associated with Marfan's and I have read that as well. So I am betting I have Marfan's too, Just not as severe as Tim's. So, it is probably in our sibling group generation, and you all have 50:50 chance to have gotten it from dad. And 50:50 chance to have passed it on to your kids. It is autosomal dominant (thus the 50:50 chance), so you only need one defective gene, not two, and you either get it or you don't.
The taller and more slender people have more of a risk.
Some symptoms of Marfan's: heart issues (May be Di Gorge Syndrome, which they also think Tim has), sleep apnea, scoliosis, hernias, spontaneous collapsed lungs, detached retinas, hypermobility in joints, low BP/fainting, chest malformations, malformation of jaw, etc. There are more, but these are some of the main ones. Many people don't even know they have it (like me-as I age, they are popping up) until someone else in the family is found out to have it. Can be so subtle, or all the symptoms very noticible.
Just passing on the word, and for you to keep an eye out for these things. I am really not trying to be a downer...I just want you to have this information in the back of your mind, if anything arises with yourselves, or the next generation of the Fallon clan.
Love to all of you.
Colleen
I have found out that my low BP can also be associated with Marfan's and I have read that as well. So I am betting I have Marfan's too, Just not as severe as Tim's. So, it is probably in our sibling group generation, and you all have 50:50 chance to have gotten it from dad. And 50:50 chance to have passed it on to your kids. It is autosomal dominant (thus the 50:50 chance), so you only need one defective gene, not two, and you either get it or you don't.
The taller and more slender people have more of a risk.
Some symptoms of Marfan's: heart issues (May be Di Gorge Syndrome, which they also think Tim has), sleep apnea, scoliosis, hernias, spontaneous collapsed lungs, detached retinas, hypermobility in joints, low BP/fainting, chest malformations, malformation of jaw, etc. There are more, but these are some of the main ones. Many people don't even know they have it (like me-as I age, they are popping up) until someone else in the family is found out to have it. Can be so subtle, or all the symptoms very noticible.
Just passing on the word, and for you to keep an eye out for these things. I am really not trying to be a downer...I just want you to have this information in the back of your mind, if anything arises with yourselves, or the next generation of the Fallon clan.
Love to all of you.
Colleen
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